Big Cities, Big Dreams and Overwhelming Reality

I never saw myself writing a blog but here I am. Hands poised ready to spill my emotions and thoughts into cyberspace.

Here I sit wondering, what brought me to this moment? what was the trigger point that made me load up a blogging site and take the plunge?

and then it hit me.....Big Cities, Big Dreams and Overwhelming reality....let me explain. In order to get us both on the same page let me give a bit of backstory. Actually before I do I think its only fair to warn you that my writing style is terrible. I write like I tend to think.....in three different directions at once. Unfortunately that means I do have a tendancy to get sidetracked from the main plot (much like this). Okay back to the point.

I am Australian and despite living abroad I am still very connected in heart and soul to my country. I initially moved away from my home town around 1 1/2 years ago. I packed my bags to pursue a dream that's been floating around in the back of my mind for a long time. I wanted to live in new york city. The reasons are too numerous to fill you in at the moment, maybe something for another day. What did I expect to see in New York that I couldn't see elsewhere? pace.....and lots of it. Glimmering lights, bustling streets, huge towers hurling towards the stars. To be honest when I arrived that's exactly what I saw. I fell in love, with the city and all it had to throw at me. Unfortunately the problem with dreams is they tend to ignore all the downsides that come hand in hand.

So here I am living in New York City, with great aspirations to make a difference. How quickly I realised I am but a social security number swimming in a sea of endless numbers. I am but a face like 8 million others pouring into offices and being spat back out 10pm each night. As I walk to the train station I pass the poor beggar struggling to survive in the cold, weave by the man trying to encourage me into a sleazy titty bar and try ignore that overly powerful smell pouring from the subway.

So there is a brief backstory......sounds very similar to a lot of other new yorkers I am sure. But what was the trigger for this blog post? the fact that today I realised the sheer overwhelming reality of where I am. I left a place with plenty of friends, family that loves me and work that was rewarding. Now I have but one good friend in the whole country and he works similar hours to me so catching up is always a challenge. When things go bad who do i have to talk it through? Do I scream out at the top of my lungs? do I bottle it up inside?........what about letting it out in a blog?

To be honest like most people this is a completely selfish blog to pour out my feelings. My hope is that by letting everything out on the page will make things better..I guess thats for time to tell!

Well to anyone that may be reading this out there I give a big hello and thank you for getting this far! Welcome to Mitch's crazy world!

cheers
Mitch